The trap of perfectionism
Perfectionists tend to hold very high standards for themselves and their loved ones. This can come from being overly attached to goals and standards and needing to be more open to flexibility in the present moment.
While perfectionist tendencies have many positive aspects, it is essential to recognise their traps.
1. Self-perfectionism
Self-perfectionism traps people in a rigid mindset of being fault-free in other people's eyes. When people adopt this mindset, it can be excruciating to see the slightest sense of disapproval from others, which leads them to punish themselves when a mistake has been made. These faulty cognitions keep people stuck and tend to play repeatedly in their minds, almost as a form of self-mockery or self-punishment.
These thoughts take people away from the present moment and keep them from changing their behaviours effectively to help them reach their goals.
2. Social perfectionism
Social perfectionism is the mindset that other people should comply with your rules. This form of perfectionism can be tiring as the only person's behaviour people can control is their own. This form of perfectionism can leave people frustrated and often proves to be ineffective. Sometimes other people's ideas and desires correspond with your own, and others hold differing views or have different wants and needs. To avoid this perfectionism trap, you can learn how to build up your emotional tolerance by focusing on what you can tolerate about essential people in your life. Try to look for one positive to balance each negative.
https://introspectivecounselingllc.com/4-strategies-for-overcoming-perfectionism/
3. Learning perfectionism
Learning perfectionism occurs when you find yourself being your worst critic while trying to learn something new. Perfectionists are excessively harsh on themselves when they don't pick up new skills or knowledge immediately. We can all be awkward and slow when learning a new skill, so you can reframe your difficulty as a learning opportunity by applying mindfulness to the challenges you encounter when learning something new.
4. Product perfectionism
Product perfectionism is the idea that anything " less than perfection" in what you do is seen as unacceptable and evokes a strong feeling of anxiety. When creating something new, many perfectionists feel a powerful anxiety over whether the final product will be " good enough" or meet some ideal standard. When experiencing this, you can try to reframe your anxiety by recognising that development is a process. Notice that creating new products has many stages and that there are often opportunities to go back and make product revisions later.
5. Comparative trap
Most of us experience this one without even being aware of it. The comparative trap occurs when you relentlessly compare your accomplishments to those of others. Perfectionists tend to choose accomplished people to look up to and compare their progress. While having very successful role models can be inspiring and motivating, be careful that it doesn't put you in the position of never being satisfied "enough" with your work that you can develop real traction and momentum. Instead of getting caught up in this competitive mindset, focus on what you can do to improve. If you must compete or compare, your current self to your former self and strive to be "better" than you used to be.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/za/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap